Wednesday 8 June 2011

Fantasy feature: Guardian re-writes history and turns Ryan Giggs from Mr Nice Guy to love rat


"Sometimes interviewers get it just a little bit wrong," confesses the Guardian's Simon Hattenstone in an article for the paper's G2 section today.

He is referring to his interview in the Guardian's Weekend magazine last year with Ryan Giggs in which he portrayed the Man Utd winger as a "Mr. Nice Guy" - a good family man who had "never visited the front pages of the red-tops".

Hattenstone writes: "He was a veritable saint in the sordid, whoring world of contemporary football. Indeed, I asked him how he managed to live such an ascetic life when surrounded by such fallen giants as John Terry, Wayne Rooney and Ashley Cole, and whether he felt footballers were paid so much that women had become just another commodity. At the time, I wrote: 'Giggs nods diplomatically and keeps his counsel'."

Now showing the ability to change direction as sharply as the Welsh wing wizard, Hattenstone has re-written his interview "in light of recent allegations".

The re-write is headlined: 'Multiple love rat finishes last in nice-guy stakes ' It begins: "When asked how he kept his todger in his pants in the rampantly priapic world of football, he maintained a diplomatic silence.

" 'I don't know,' he said. He looked shamefacedly to the floor, and added: 'Actually there's something I've got to tell you Simon. The thing is, and this is through no fault of my own, but I have actually been sleeping with a former unnamed reality show star . . . But my wife doesn't know about it.'

" 'Oh my God,' I gulped. 'You disappointingly randy rascal'."

If only...

1 comment:

Paul Linford said...

I can feel a Private Eye appology coming on here....