Why I love local newspapers: It's because they come up with stories and headlines like this

You can read the full story on the Daily Post website. It involves a man accused of “unsafe modification” of a bouncy castle who failed to appear in court to answer a charge of breaching an order which bans him from carrying out inspections of "inflatable amusement devices".

Also this fantastic intro from the Middlesbrough Evening Gazette on Monday: "ALCOHOLIC Alan Hackett swung an axe at a woman after he got drunk to celebrate the completion of an alcohol treatment programme."